November 20, 2012

The Future Is Unwritten, So Write It Well.

Have you ever found yourself thinking of a random person?
 
Like your fourth grade crush or someone who you chatted with once at a coffee shop?
 
It happens to me quite often...and I wonder what that person is up to RIGHT NOW.
 
Sometimes that person was a best friend who I unfortunately drifted apart from.
A song, smell, food, even something silly like a t-shirt will make me think of her.
 
Other times I find myself thinking of random people who I met once for an hour.
Where do they live now? Are they married? What are they doing with themselves?
 
And then I can't help but wonder ...
 
How often do I pop up in the mind of an acquaintance or friend from the past?
 
What reminds them of me?
What details do they remember about me?
What thoughts do they hold on to about me?
 
And are they good thoughts, or are they negative thoughts?
 
I can admit that I've said and done things to people in my past that I'm not proud of.
 
If I could apologize to each person individually, face to face, and make amends, I would.
 
But I can't.
 
So, if you're reading this and you're one of those people:
 
I'm sorry.
 
And if you're one of the people who made my life a living hell for a moment in time:
 
You've been forgiven.
 
Ever since marrying TJ I feel like I've grown by leaps and bounds.
 
The silly, drama filled moments of my life just don't matter any more.
 
The most important thing in my life is family -
and I've recently taken a step back from any and all things 
which could potentially disrupt that.
 
Did I finally grow up?
 

How do you know when you've grown up?
Do you just wake up one day and say "Okay, I'm a grown up!"
or.....?

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7 comments

  1. LOVE THIS:) So well written and honest!

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  2. Love this! I often find myself daydreaming over the exact same things. I laugh about the drama that used to follow me and am so thankful that it is out of my life.

    ps. I am also loving the new blog design :)

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  3. I don't know... I am not sure you ever just wake up and think it. It is a gradual development - personally I feel like each year I have progressed since entering the word of work the more 'grown up' I feel. After the year I have had however, I feel like things have sped up somewhat faster than I thought. I feel not only grown up but also the need to actually grow up too.
    Missy

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  4. WOW! You have taken the words right out of my mouth. For weeks now I've been wanting to write a post like this and have been having the same thoughts with friendships lost, and people who have "done me wrong." Thank you for writing this, so nice to know I'm not alone.

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  5. When your'e paying your own bills and taking responsibility for your parents, feeding your dogs, doing the laundry, looking forward to an afternoon nap, when you turn the music down on the radio...you've grown up :)

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  6. I'm kind of with you... I think that one day, it just happens. There will be things that you used to be interested in that you aren't anymore. Or people you don't hang out with anymore because your lives are on different tracks. It's a gradual change I think, but one day you just realize things are different.

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  7. I think I transitioned to a grown up when I had my first child. However, I still love sparkly vampires and Britney Spears. I refuse to give up everything silly for adulthood.

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