December 6, 2013

It Means No Worries For The Rest Of Your Days


I've been framing all of life's upsets lately with "Is this going to matter in five years?" ... and you know what? For almost every single little thing that's been attempting to bring me down lately, the answer has been N-O, it will not matter then, which means it should not matter now ... and that question has been strengthening me to let negative people and situations go with ease.

I am back in Massachusetts for a few days, as we are laying my sweet Nana to rest today. My point in sharing my Nana's passing isn't to ask for condolences - I'm obviously sad that she's gone, but I'm incredibly happy that she lived such a long and wonderful life, and that I was lucky enough to have her in mine for 27 years. My point in sharing this is to stress the importance of remembering what's most important in life and to frame every upset with "Will this matter in five years?"

Would it have mattered in five years if I didn't buy that other plane ticket to come home two weeks ago to see my Nana while she was still alive? Yes, it would have mattered. And I would have surely lived a life of regret if I didn't get to see and talk to her one last time while she was still here. So while the price of that plane ticket was a major annoyance and set back our bank account substantially by a few hundred dollars ... it mattered.

It's interesting how certain situations put your entire life into perspective and make you realize what's important - and what's not so important at all, isn't it?

Do you have anything that you've been holding on to that you need to let go?
Ask yourself "Will this matter in five years?" ... well, will it?

xo,
Kym

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29 comments

  1. I definitely needed a little reminder like this, so thank you! It's so easy to get caught up in the little things & living day to day, but you're so right-- the majority of the things I stress over probably won't matter in five years! So sorry to hear about your grandma but I'm glad you were able to spend a little more time with her.

    Carly

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  2. What a great message you are passing on here! And I'm so sorry to hear about your Nana. "That which we have once enjoyed, we never lose. All that we deeply love becomes a part of us."

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  3. I had a situation like that. One of my best friends dad's passed away on Sunday from leukemia and my PT job boss wasn't working with me to let me off for the funeral. She was't offering to fill my shift, nothing. I wasn't going to argue it because she's one of those people you just don't argue with but finally I was like no, this isn't my life and I went to the boss and said look I need to be there and finally she got the point and it was covered. But my heart would have hurt had I not pushed it.

    Sorry to hear about your Nana. You will have a forever angel!

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  4. What a great way to look at problems. I am going to use this for sure! Thanks for sharing!

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  5. So sorry about your Nana and what a wonderful thing you had her into your adult life. This post touches in so many ways. My husband is always constantly asking me when I seem to over stress on the littlest things if it will matter later on...and almost all won't. I am actually getting pretty good at asking myself that same question before he does ;)

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  6. What a great way to look at life and problems, it's true sometimes you need to realize what's important and what isn't, I am so sorry for your lost.

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  7. Thinking of you! And thank you for that reminder. I need it often!

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  8. Why are you always blogging the things I need to hear?! It's because you are awesome- that's why. I'll be thinking of you and your family!

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  9. Great message. Sorry for your loss!

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  10. I'm so sorry for your loss, but what a wonderful perspective. I hate that it often takes rough situations to correct my perspective on life, but I suppose it's a blessing. I'll be thinking of you!

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  11. I think that is probably the best perspective I have seen on how to make good decisions in life. So glad you got to take some extra time with your Grandmother before she passed. Have safe travels.

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  12. I absolutely love this. And I agree, it's important to stop and think about whether something truly "matters" or not. This past March, I flew down to Florida to see my grandpa when we found out that he had severe cancer that couldn't be treated. I hadn't seen him in almost four years and his relationship with our family was far from perfect, but he was my grandpa and in that moment, all that I knew was that I had to get there to see the man who used to take my for my favorite ice cream every time he visited. And I'm so glad that I did because I know that not going would have been a huge regret. But then there are other things that I find myself worrying about or getting upset over that, if I truly thought about it, won't matter five days from now, let alone five years!!

    Jamie @
    The Growing Up Diaries

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  14. I am sorry to hear about the passing of your Nana. I truly know how amazing grandparents can be in someone's life. I love that you recognize that the dent that the cost of a plane ticket put on your wallet, was easier to bare than not having said goodbye to your Nana in person. Also, I have found over the last couple of years asking myself if a situation is really going to matter in the long run helps put things into perspective. (IE, someone jumped ahead of me in the line for registration at the hospital. Does it upset me - yes - Do those five minutes I lost because of it matter - Not really - so I might as well not dwell on it.

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  15. I am so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful post.

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  16. What a wonderful perspective, thanks so much for sharing. No matter what kind of day it is, that kind of outlook would surely lighten the weight on everyone's shoulders. My thoughts are with you, dear.

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  17. AMAZING post!! I used that sentence during the wedding.. will it matter in 5 years if that happened? (my wedding was horrible) but I love this reminder.. I have been meaning to emailing you for a while.

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  18. Thanks so much for sharing this reminder. Right now there's so much going on that I have little to no control over with my job, but what I do have control over, I'm learning to say no -- in five years, saying yes instead of no will matter when my health is worse because of it :) I'd rather have my health ...

    Sending virtual hugs and thoughts your way as well. Having lost two grandparents at the holidays is especially hard -- my grandmother passed ten years ago this Christmas Eve. I hesitated to take a preplanned trip to Vienna that December because she entered hospice two weeks before I left -- she told me to go, she regretted not traveling more when she could. She passed while I was in Vienna and I regretted not being there in the end -- everyone told me not to, she was still lucid and herself when I left and I wouldn't have the memories of our last convo being our last. I left early and made it back in time for the funeral, giving up a few days of Europe and a few hundred dollars was worth a final goodbye (((hugs)))

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  20. A wise coworker once asked me that when something was bothering me and it has stuck with me ever since. I apply it to every situation that makes me upset, frustrated and angry. And like you, the majority of the times its a big, fat NO. No need to work myself up over something that will have no influence on my life in the future.

    I'm sorry to hear about your Nana. Sending many warm hugs your way.

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  21. Really sorry for your loss, but thanks so much for sharing this. Perspective is important, and sometimes we all need to read a post like this to get some, too!

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  22. This is a really great post. I'm so sorry for your loss. I agree. In five years, will it have mattered? It's a great way to think about life and the decisions we make. Thank you for sharing and my thoughts are with you.

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  23. I'm so sorry about your grandma. My last living grandparent passed away about 3-1/2 years ago, so I can relate. I'm glad that you were able to visit with her one last time though! Your five year question is a good one - one that I need to ask myself a little more often. In the long run, very few of my "problems" will matter even a few months down the road. Thanks for a bit of perspective!

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  24. I need to ask myself that question everytime something comes up like this. Lately it seems to happen every day. And most of these things, no, it wouldn't matter in 5 years. Thanks for the word (or statement/question) of encouragement.

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  25. Just a few weeks before my only grandpa passed away, we came home for a visit. We stopped out to see my grandparents just because we felt like a visit. He said one of the sweetest things to me that day and I will never in my life forget those words. It's amazing how putting things into perspective really helps you get rid of stress! So sorry to hear of your grandma's passing, I would give you a big ol' hug if I could!

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  26. I'm sorry for your loss, my dear! Sami told me that you had something family related to deal with because I was hoping to see you last time I was up there. {{HUGS}}

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  27. This is really a great sharing but sorry for your big loss. Some people have many importance in our lives and we can not forget them.

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